a man

dearest man,

i cant stop thinking about u. i cant stop dreaming about u. everywhere i go, your face seem to get stuck in my head. are we meant to be? i know we are over in term of our relationship but im so bless that we are at least still friends. reminiscing our previous moments was beautiful but i end it all cause i couldnt take the responsibility to fix it already. i should have gone slow with the break up process but i didnt. i wanted to regret all the action i've made but i guess i shouldnt. i'm taking that as one of the solution to let you be happy, find your self being a man and also experience all the beautiful moments being as a young man before you commit yourself to a marriage.
meeting back with you on that day was one my joyful time, maybe you cant see it clearly but it is all felt in my heart. thank you for still treating me good, and i realize you did improved and fix something somehow in your self.
so this is our promise, i dont dare to email anything to you cause i dont want to disturb your mind, feeling and your education.
however, i could only browse through your pictures in my computer box. i know that you are currently happy with some girl who i understand is a really nice girl. i wish you all the best. i dont know how we'll be ending up our future but i will always wish you happiness.
honestly, i'm kinda jealous cause as time pass by, i wish to be by your side, wanted to experience all the your sad, joyful and hard moments but im here and you're there, we are far apart.
its hurt to see your profile especially when uninvited face is being place on your prime page. well, im just an ordinary human that have weaknesses inside. :)
this journey somehow teaches me about my selfishness and the ego attitude as i mistakenly understood as a person who dont want to be look down on and my happiness is more important that anyone else.. so right now, im am going to learn slow about this negatives and try to accept thing as they are.

dearest man,

i dont want to burned your self about me. i know we have promise something but i wish it didnt effect your decision in life. be happy.
though, im still hoping something somehow.